A concerned mother turned to the Reddit community in the r/parenting subreddit seeking advice when the teacher punished her daughter’s “off-limit” behavior by getting the other kids to ignore her.
The first-grader earned some prizes during the read-a-thon competition, and one prize included a movie day at school.
When she didn’t enjoy the movie, she asked her teacher supervising if she could return to her classroom, which the teacher allowed.
When she returned to her classroom, her teacher scolded her and said she was being impolite due to her actions. The teacher told her she was “off limits” for the rest of the day.
The parent was confused and questioned her daughter what “off limits” meant, and her daughter replied that it happens when the teacher “tells everyone not to talk to you or acknowledge you.” The parent thinks this sounds “cruel.”
“Maybe there’s more to the story, but my daughter insists there isn’t, and I believe her. She was worried I would be mad, but I definitely am not,” the parent explained.
The parent is confused as to why their daughter’s teacher would be so offended by her request and wonders if she is overreacting to their concern.
The parent noted that her daughter is incredibly well-behaved, rarely ever gets into trouble, and was given a movie day as one of her prizes, so she doesn’t understand why she should be forced to watch something she doesn’t enjoy.
The parent seeks insight into the teacher’s reaction and ponders what might have happened to cause such a response.
Read More: Dad Won’t Let His Daughter Speak Her “Native” Language at Home, Is He Wrong?
What is “The Silent Treatment”
According to Medical News Today, silent treatment is when someone refuses to speak with another person, sometimes even ignoring their presence.
As per the article, giving someone the silent treatment can be considered emotional abuse if it is used as a tool for controlling and manipulating the other person.
Prolonged periods of silence, talking to others while ignoring the other person, and using silence to assign blame and make the individual feel guilty are all signs of abusive behavior.
Social Media Reacts to The News
The post received more than 500 comments, with most commenters believing that the mother was well within her right to be concerned and to contact the teacher.
“I don’t think you’re overreacting. I’d at least ask for clarification from the teacher,” said one person.
“Agree with this. Ask for clarification. Don’t cc the principal in the first instance—that’s level jumping. If not satisfied, then escalate,” another person responded.
A first-grade teacher commented on the post. “Please talk to the teacher first. Ask what the punishment means. Even the best students can misunderstand. I’m not saying your daughter is wrong, but it’s always best to speak with the adult before believing that what your child interpreted from a situation is true. They’re 6-7 after all, and while so smart and caring, they can misread a situation.”
One person, whose mother is a middle school teacher, believes she’s heard of this rule. “Off limits is actually something developed to help kids who want to be left alone, be left alone. It’s normally utilized in the higher grade levels, particularly middle and high school,” they continued. “A kid having a bad day who doesn’t want the teacher calling him, his neighbor annoying him, etc., can ask to be off limits, and the teacher will enforce it. No one will be able to bug him.”
TPR Teaching produced and syndicated the article Teacher Tells First Grader She’s “Off Limits” And For The Other Kids to Ignore Her. Source.
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I'm an Irish tutor and founder of TPR Teaching. I started teaching in 2016 and have since taught in the UK, Spain, and online.
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